A few weeks ago, Facebook was agog with the ‘runs girl’ chaos. People were dropping comments in their millions, for and against. There were lots of testimonies of people who were pushed to hell and back but still didn’t give in, people who faced hardship and still did not yield, they even married as virgins. I never commented, my only thought was, ‘the street is badass, kind people are dead and gone’.
I am full of stories, let me tell you another tonight.
Back at NIJ I had some issues, it was my last semester and the final exams were approaching. I played NairaBet with my school fees and couldn’t pay up. Well, not NairaBet actually but some friend had my money and disappeared with it, it was meant to be my school fees. The school had this policy of not allowing anybody write exams without paying in full, which they always told admission seekers during interview, I knew that for a fact so I shouldn’t have been that stupid, but I was, unfortunately.
Exams were approaching and it was getting more and more difficult to raise my fees. I couldn’t call home to ask for money because my Dad wired the full payment into my account before I even resumed, I only leveraged on the school’s installmental payment policy to do the rubbish I did, not like I couldn’t have made full payment.
People were studying and I kept losing weight, I couldn’t study. I had mostly straight A’s in my first semester and knew if I had same during the second, I would graduate with a Distinction, I was that positive, but school fees dey show me pepper.
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I started talking to friends, I didn’t really have close ones except the few ones I made in school and the virtual online friends that I had never seen. I was all up for doing it myself, friends could help but not family, I wouldn’t call them. That was my greatest undoing.
I won’t bore you so much with my long story, but here are some of the things I heard and experienced when I begged some ‘friends’ for money, it was 60k or thereabout.
“I have always liked you and dreamed of fucking you, I will pay 10k for each round, what you earn depends on how far you are willing to go” – some undercover agent that just returned from the US
“Will you let me and my dog fuck you” – one yeye dog dealer
One dude gave me a postdated cheque and waited till two days before my exam before he told me not to present it. I can’t remember them all.
A day to the exam I called my ex and told him I would be dropping out. Though he helped in his little way, but it wasn’t enough. I broke down completely and wouldn’t talk to anybody. Then that thought came that I should open up to my Dad, even if not entirely. This was a man who got my list of books and bought them to the very last even before I was formally offered an admission, a man who made me comfortable all through the program, who never joked with my allowances, he wouldn’t want me to drop out. So I made the call, like the prodigal child, and it saved my career.
I made that payment at exactly 3pm a day to my exams and I didn’t start studying until later that evening. My friends took care of my transportation and feeding throughout that period, I was down to nothing.
Looking back now and reflecting on people’s judgmental and harsh comments, I feel they find it easy to mock pains they’ve never experienced. People have their different thresholds and the fear of failure is greater in some than others.
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What if I didn’t have an understanding Dad? What if I was an orphan and I had struggled to get that admission and that certificate was my only hope of survival? You think there ain’t people like that? I know what I would have done anyway. I would have chosen the lesser of the two evils up there, don’t ask me what. Now you can put on your robes and become Judge Judy.
As much as it’s greed that leads some girls to do the shitty things they do, ‘I must slay by force’, some actually hate the fact that they do it, they cry and feel dirty afterwards and if they had any other choice, they wouldn’t.
Before you roll your eyes at me, how many people have you helped without wanting something in return? How many have you assisted without trying to get into their pants? Don’t bother replying me, argue with your conscience. If you do not solicit for sex in return of favors, those helpless girls won’t hawk it.
Help someone today without lusting after their body. Sometimes, it takes a great deal of courage for people to swallow their pride and ask for help. Not all of us were born with silver spoons.
Written By: Anne Abidemi Akinnagbe
Connect with Me on facebook: Anne Abidemi