Finding a date in today’s fast-paced world is challenging enough,
without the complication of hooking up with a guy who seems to have another girl on the side. Girls have to be more cautious when
choosing the guys they will be in a relationship with, because there
are lots of men outside there who want to catch more fun before they settle down. You might not be the only one he refers to when he changes his status to “In a relationship”. Don’t be naive and stupid, walk out before you suffer mental, physical and psychological problems.
Here are some red flags to look out for if you start having doubts about him;
1. He has not introduced you to his friends or family. After
a few months of dating, you still don’t get to know his families especially his friends, his families might be far but not meeting his friends is unjustifiable. Think well, its likely his friends know someone already as his own to be and he wouldn’t want to start hearing of how bad he is to have done this to the girl, there is also no way news won’t get to the girl that the man she trusts is double dating. To avoid that then, he will never introduce you to his friends. Come to think of it, does it mean there are no special day he hangs out with his friends? Why didn’t he take you along? Because the main girl is going to be there? For that, he gives you series of excuses and promises to take you to the next one. He will keep promising that dear.
2. He consistently cancels dates at the last minute. If
you are always getting cancelled on the day of your date, it’s a red flag. Don’t ignore this sign, its a sign he must have been held down by another main girl. And I tell you, he will come back giving lots of excuses of how tedious work is, how the traffic was terrific and how his shoes got damaged on his way.
3. He introduces you as his friend or he uses the “S” method always. He gets caught with you on the road as he walks with another girl, he introduces you always as my friend or he says “sweetheart, meet my sweetheart” Its a red flag, a man doesn’t keep two sweethearts always if he isn’t double dating. Saying it first time is understandable if his reasons are genuine but saying often is suspicious. Be careful, you are just a friend with benefits. Get out of your dream world and find a man who wants to say “Casandra, meet my one and only sweetheart” That way you go home fulfilled and excited not with double minds.
4. He mentions other women as his business associates. That is how it starts, are there only females in the office? Do you have meetings in your organization only in the evening? What about males too? Cant I get to hear “I am scheduling a meeting with Nelson? Does it have to be one female to another? Watch out dear, he is not going for any meeting, he is going on a date and he will likely be referring to you as the same.
5. He does not talk about the future with you. I keep wondering how a responsible lady will be comfortable dating a man who does not talk or include you in his future plans. A relationship should have where it is going to even if it didn’t end in that initial direction, maybe you got separated or fate creep in, you should at first thought of him as the one you want to end up with unless you are a flirt. If you aren’t a flirt reading this, and your present man isn’t talking about the future with you, its a red flag he is double dating or does not even want you to be the one. All men dream of that one girl that will carry their kids. If your man has never pat your belly and say “my kids will come from here one day, you are just but a side chick.
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6. He forgets or confuses important information about you as time goes on. When a guy is juggling multiple women at once, he is going to forget some certain things. A man who has your interest at heart shouldn’t forget your important details such as your birthday, your hobby, your favorite food. If he starts to, then you have got a problem.It’s even worst if he starts mixing and guessing what he should know. It’s a major red flag and you shouldn’t put up with it.
7. His cell phone is strictly off limits. Your partner has made it clear, not necessarily telling you directly, that his cell phone is off limits. He uses password to protect his phones and he never leaves it lying around. If this is his attitude, chances are there are things on his cell he doesn’t want you to know about. This should make you wonder if he has a secret girlfriend because he should be able to trust you, you should be able to trust him, and it’s hard to establish trust when there is a mystery cell phone in the picture. Another red flag.
8. He needs privacy for certain calls always. Most of the time if his phone rings, he will simply answer it and talk even when you are around. There are calls, however, that he seems to need privacy for. He will go where you can’t hear him or he will answer in an attitude that is suspicious. He might be shouting “hello” into the phone and blame network for that. He will as well angle his body so you can’t see what he is texting. This is a suspicious behavior and a big red flag too.
9. You catch him severally saying different answers to one question. No player is as good as he thinks he is. Try asking him what he did a few weeks ago when he canceled on you. He will always give a different answer. Ask how that movie he supposedly went to watch ended, he will stumble or answer wrong and you will know for
sure. That’s another flag.
10. He avoids anything that is not sex. He sees you as a side chick, only good for the bed, so everything he says or deals with you should be in the bed. Since he’s not interested in a real relationship, he doesn’t want to spend time alone with you.
If you suspect your partner has a secret lover, you owe it to yourself to clear the air and find out where you stand. It’s true that finding a date is a challenge these days, and finding a life partner is even more difficult. If he has another girl, you shouldn’t waste your time on him. Look for someone else!